For all autistics out there

Post by **Tiff** » Mon Jun 14, 2004 12:35 pm

Rindesayu wrote:OT: Aside from a lot of you supposedly having autism, isn't there ANYBODY within these forums that is actually outgoing and doesn't have social problems of some sort? When asked what type of person he/she is, most people here seem to give the same answer: "shy, lonely, (cold-hearted) introvert". I know I'm not perfect either and I'm really not trying to sound narrow-minded in any way, I'm just a bit bewildered...

*Raises hand*

The only "problem" I have (and it's more of a preference than an actual problem) is I prefer to be in smaller groups than in large social settings. I simply find larger groups to be impersonal, and I'd much rather be with 2 really close friends than with 15 people who only know my name. Other than that, I consider myself pretty outgoing, and I don't purposely isolate myself. Once in a while I'll experience regular loneliness, but that's only human *shrug*

Artemis1973 · Post by **Artemis1973** » Mon Jun 14, 2004 2:01 pm

I have autism, and I am happy with my life too.

ShanSunflower · Post by **ShanSunflower** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:19 am

I am an aspie, and I wasn't diagnosed until I was 17.

I lived my younger years being bullied for "not being normal" and "behaving in a socially unacceptable manner". I had no idea what I was doing wrong. Things I did or failed to do were apparantly things that people knew by instinct. I was quiet, too, because I had no idea how to act around anyone.

Rainbow · Post by **Rainbow** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:53 am

Me too, except for:
1) It was more verbal than physical bullying.
2) I reacted noisily to it and had outbursts. (I'm more of a loner than truly "quiet")
3) I wasn't diagnosed until very recently.
4) I had very accepting parents who helped me through it, too, and some very helpful teachers, too.

ShanSunflower · Post by **ShanSunflower** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 11:10 am

1) It was more verbal than physical bullying.
No one would think of beating me up because I was the little girl with some "disease" that they'd become infected with and die from if they touched me. It sounds like a little thing to most people, but to have every single person around them treat them like this, the feeling is... undescribable. I did get a little bit of nasty verbal bullying from girls.

2) I reacted noisily to it and had outbursts. (I'm more of a loner than truly "quiet")
Most people didn't know I even had a voice, so presentations in front of the class were always a big surprise.

3) I wasn't diagnosed until very recently.
I was only diagnosed about a little more than a year ago, shortly before my 18th birthday.

4) I had very accepting parents who helped me through it, too, and some very helpful teachers, too.
You are lucky. I had teachers and parents who said the bullying was my fault.... that I brought it on.
Unlike most people I talk to, the bullying I went through in younger years pretty much slopped in high school instead of getting worse.

Rainbow · Post by **Rainbow** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 12:12 pm

ShanSunflower wrote: No one would think of beating me up because I was the little girl with some "disease" that they'd become infected with and die from if they touched me. It sounds like a little thing to most people, but to have every single person around them treat them like this, the feeling is... undescribable. I did get a little bit of nasty verbal bullying from girls.
3) I wasn't diagnosed until very recently.
I was only diagnosed about a little more than a year ago, shortly before my 18th birthday.

1) I think I have less of a broad definition of bullying than a lot of people do, which is why I said that.

2)Oops, I didn't know when, I just saw that you were 19 and assumed it was longer.

ShanSunflower · Post by **ShanSunflower** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 5:24 pm

1) I think I have less of a broad definition of bullying than a lot of people do, which is why I said that.

I'm just wondering what the type of bullying I went through was, or, if it wasn't bullying, what it is actually called.

Rainbow · Post by **Rainbow** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 5:29 pm

I would call that verbal abuse, or the term I used when I was younger, "teasing."

Rainbow · Post by **Rainbow** » Wed Jul 21, 2004 6:19 am

Tiff wrote: Take a look at the net sometimes. You go to websites, weblogs, and forums, and it seems every person between the ages of 13-18 have some depressive mental disease...and they all say the same things: "I have no friends. I can't go out. I hate crowds. I feel sad. I'm lonely."

1) That's because the 'net is more popular with introverts than extroverts. So the people who DON'T like to be around people IRL use the Internet for virtual socialization.

2) My Aspberger's is not just teen angst--for one thing, I didn't find out until I was 18, and my parents thought of it first. (so I'm technically not a teenager anymore) Also, it probably has something to do with the fact that I not only have Dandy Walker Syndrome (which means I have a shunt in the back of my head now and that I had a lot of surgeries when I was younger; it also means that my motor skills development was slowed down--but not my intelligence or reading!) and I had hydrocephalis as a baby. (there's baby pictures of me with a REALLY big forehead) The second thing, my mom says that one might've caused the Aspberger's.

Sailorasteroid · Post by **Sailorasteroid** » Wed Jul 21, 2004 7:28 am

I agree that too often teenage social problems are misdiagnosed as psychological disorders. But I don't think that "Grow up and change your attitude" is the right message to send. We place such a premium on being friendly or sociable, we don't see the value of being an individual. We look at some people and say, "look how many friends they have! They must be a really great person!" and others we say "They have no friends. There must be something wrong with them." But we shuld say, "They have no friends. They must be doing really well in their own affairs. We should try to encourage them."

Rainbow · Post by **Rainbow** » Wed Jul 21, 2004 8:04 am

1) I apologize--18 could be still considered a teenager in some circles. That part was unnecessary to say.

2) This may just be me, but judging teens in general off the ones who post on their Internet blogs "I have no friends and I'm lonely" is unfair. It's just that the teens who have lots of friends are too busy doing things with them to post on the 'net as much. I didn't even realize this until my mom pointed that out to me! I know that if I wanted to socialize more with "real people" that I wouldn't have as much time for this forum as I do.

Post by **Tiff** » Wed Jul 21, 2004 1:12 pm

Rainbow wrote:1) I apologize--18 could be still considered a teenager in some circles. That part was unnecessary to say.

2) This may just be me, but judging teens in general off the ones who post on their Internet blogs "I have no friends and I'm lonely" is unfair. It's just that the teens who have lots of friends are too busy doing things with them to post on the 'net as much. I didn't even realize this until my mom pointed that out to me! I know that if I wanted to socialize more with "real people" that I wouldn't have as much time for this forum as I do.

Okay, First off, I have no idea why you felt the need to resurrect an old thread to reply to something I said over a month ago.

And who the hell said I was judging teens in general based off the ones on the internet?!

I don't think you understand what type of teen I was. I never had large groups of friends, either. I stayed inside all summer long, ON THE INTERNET. I didn't go out to parties, I didn't socialize, and I stayed by myself. So don't sit here and lecture me about the net being better for introverts, when I know that very well.

But I didn't sit there and angst the whole time. I was happy.

I'm ONLY talking about the large teen base that DOES feel the need to sit around and bitch and moan about their lives, and then suddenly come up with 10 different mental disorders to find an excuse as to why they're not happy. THAT'S what I'm talking about.

If it doesn't apply to you, then why the hell do you care? If you're secure enough in your asperger's syndrome, or whatever else it is you may have, then why on earth do you feel the need to defend yourself?

Rainbow · Post by **Rainbow** » Wed Jul 21, 2004 1:49 pm

1) Why did I defend myself? Because while I'm secure in my personality as it is, I'm still kind of scared of this "Aspberger's" label. I think when I'm defending it, I'm telling myself that it's okay to call it that. I still prefer the "INTP" classification, since that sounds so much more healthy, but it doesn't quite explain the facts about me repeating myself or my literalism/misunderstanding it when people are kidding around.

2) I'm sorry. I did not know that you knew about the 'net being popular amongst introverts

I certainly had to be told that; people seem so extroverted and happy on their webpages, always bouncing around and getting excited.

3) Because I had some strong feelings about that post, and it was new to me, since I didn't read the rest of this topic until very recently. It wasn't old to me.

Also, I'm a baka, I forgot my own age! D'oh! I'm not 18 anymore! D'oh!

Post by **Tiff** » Wed Jul 21, 2004 1:54 pm

Rainbow wrote:1) Why did I defend myself? Because while I'm secure in my personality as it is, I'm still kind of scared of this "Aspberger's" label. I think when I'm defending it, I'm telling myself that it's okay to call it that. I still prefer the "INTP" classification, since that sounds so much more healthy, but it doesn't quite explain the facts about me repeating myself or my literalism/misunderstanding it when people are kidding around.

2) I'm sorry. I did not know that you knew about the 'net being popular amongst introverts I certainly had to be told that; people seem so extroverted and happy on their webpages, always bouncing around and getting excited.

3) Because I had some strong feelings about that post, and it was new to me, since I didn't read the rest of this topic until very recently. It wasn't old to me.

Rainbow...don't defend yourself unless someone is actually talking ABOUT you. Honestly, it just makes you look completely paranoid, foolish, and 100% insecure. Nobody insulted you or your disorder, yet you felt the need to jump on what I said.

And I find that very strange, that you just now read the rest of your topic. If this topic interests you so greatly, then why on earth would you just stop reading about it, especially when you've posted seriously in it?

And Rainbow...I spend more time on this damn forum than anyone else. Do you really think I'm out having parties most of the time? Come on. How could you NOT know that I'm not one to go out and socialize?

Rainbow · Post by **Rainbow** » Wed Jul 21, 2004 2:10 pm

Tiff wrote: And I find that very strange, that you just now read the rest of your topic. If this topic interests you so greatly, then why on earth would you just stop reading about it, especially when you've posted seriously in it?

Stop? I didn't stop, I didn't see the topic in the first place, you moved my initial post here. And I'm not sure why I didn't read the rest of it, really, but I guess I just didn't, or I just didn't have a reaction to it before.

As for assuming you liked to socialize, I'm not sure why, but I guess I just assumed that because I would've guessed you were an extrovert from the way you are on the forum. I tend to assume people who are in charge are extroverts, probably, though I know intellectually it's not true.

Post by **Tiff** » Wed Jul 21, 2004 8:32 pm

Rainbow wrote:
Stop? I didn't stop, I didn't see the topic in the first place, you moved my initial post here. And I'm not sure why I didn't read the rest of it, really, but I guess I just didn't, or I just didn't have a reaction to it before.

Interesting, considering the fact that you posted TWICE after your post was moved...so obviously, you DID know the topic was here, at least after it was moved...which shows that you at least read enough.

Either way, nothing I said was even remotely directly at you, so stop being so defensive, please.

Alexclow345 · Post by **Alexclow345** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 9:09 pm

I am Autistic and I have a fairly normal life. No one even notices it and No one knows except my family and now SMU. I do talk a lot though.

Rin · Post by **Rin** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 10:32 pm

I have a nephew who is two and he may have autism. If he does, it will probably be a very minor case. He just now started eating solid foods, and most of the time he walks around and doesn't really notice anyone. He's really cute, he lookes like Mcully Culken. (Ok, I know I spelt that wrong.)

I'm going into occupational therapy so I'll probably be working with autistic kids.

yoshmaster5 · Post by **yoshmaster5** » Wed Jul 05, 2006 10:35 pm

I have a cousin that's autistic... and... no offense to anyone here... he's a madman. His parents are in denial that he is autistic, even now at the age of 7 he still barely speaks, draws over everything, and runs around his house wihtout his pants on. They don't disipline him at all, so he does wahtever the hell he wants. For my family... it's almost torture to go to their house... because of him. Their daughter doesn't seem to be autistic, but there is somethign wrong with her as well. My cousin's case is probably the most extreme of anything... he'd never function well in the real world. My aunt and uncle will probably have to take care of him the rest of their lives... I really feel sorry for them, but... ... I'm sorry, it's just... ... I guess looking at the worst case scenario can throw you off a bit...

Post by **Tiff** » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:26 am

yoshmaster5 wrote:I have a cousin that's autistic... and... no offense to anyone here... he's a madman. His parents are in denial that he is autistic, even now at the age of 7 he still barely speaks, draws over everything, and runs around his house wihtout his pants on. They don't disipline him at all, so he does wahtever the hell he wants. For my family... it's almost torture to go to their house... because of him. Their daughter doesn't seem to be autistic, but there is somethign wrong with her as well. My cousin's case is probably the most extreme of anything... he'd never function well in the real world. My aunt and uncle will probably have to take care of him the rest of their lives... I really feel sorry for them, but... ... I'm sorry, it's just... ... I guess looking at the worst case scenario can throw you off a bit...

He's at such a delicate age...and he's getting too old. If they don't do something now, he'll probably be lost to them forever. His behavior is inexcusible, I don't care what mental illness he has. Tsk. It's a shame when parents are so far into deniable that they inadvertantly end up screwing over their own childrens' lives.

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For all autistics out there

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