If you had a kid...

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Jusenkyo no Pikachu
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Post by Jusenkyo no Pikachu » Fri Mar 18, 2005 10:44 am

Re: Foreign names

As I've said before on this board...somewhere...a friend of mine (who sings soprano with my mother--her husband sings tenor and I sing bass) named her second child Emmie Claire. She originally was going to use Emma, but her husband is of Japanese descent so that was out of the question as Enma means "death" in Japanese. My sister loves this fact.

My aunt also named her daughter Lysha. Apparently, that means "the hour before midnight", although at the time she was born, it would have been 11pm somewhere in the Atlantic. Could have been worse--had she been a boy, she would have been named "Wylligand".

[end re]

Also, I can't see the reasoning for why parents choose to alter spelling of typical names (such as "Khrystypher" instead of "Christopher") just to be "different". I'm aware that my name is derived from "Khristophoros", but isn't it corrupted enough?

As for me, if I had a girl (for some reason, I can't see myself raising a boy), I'd probably call her Clarissa.
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Post by Umino » Fri Mar 18, 2005 11:57 am

Tiff wrote:And thank you for understanding my points. No, "Honey" wouldn't be quite as bad as "Goku" or "Gourry", being that "Honey" is actually a legitimate, older name. It's simply that I pity your child for the sheer and utter teasing she'll probably go through.
That's one of the reasons I like the name Honey though. 'Honey' is (or rather used to be..) a pretty 'common' name. It use to be a name I always hear. And if I name a girl 'Honey', is someone going to think of Cutie Honey? It'd be different if it was something well known. An example would be this one girl at school. Her name is Barbie, and everyone makes cracks at her about it. My friend of mine is named 'Chanel'. She's always getting called 'channel' or 'coco'. My mom's name (before she was married) as Wendy Darling. Yes, Wendy Darling from Peter Pan. And her brother was named Peter. She still complains about it to this day. My sister recently had a son. What did she name him? Kilen. Oh wait, sorry, 'Keilan'. Not only did she get the name from a bus company, but she spelt it wrong. When you see the name 'Keilan' don't you think it'll be said as 'K-lan and not 'KI lan'?

But overall, this is a big 'WHAT IF' for me. I really, really don't want children. But if I do, I sure I'll think of a name more carefully.

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Post by AnimeGuru0 » Fri Mar 18, 2005 12:24 pm

Sailorasteroid wrote: If the objection is whether the name will be so unusual that it will give the child problems, then I see your point
That's EXACTLY what the point is.

Nobody is disagreeing that it's good to have hobbies and to be passionate about them. The point is that if you give your kid some crazy name, they're going to have to LIVE with that name.

This conversation is not about rights, it's not about a parent's right to choose a name for their child, it's about the potential DANGER that accompanies that right.

And as for your earlier post, if you want to go and change your name to makoto or whatever, by all means be my guest. That's YOUR name. You own it. It's yours. It's your choice. Unfortunately, your child has no agency on what name it gets assigned to it. Thus you have to be a little more considerate when naming him or her.

Basically what it comes down to is this: It's not ok to live vicariously through your child. If anime, sports, tv, video games, etc is what defines YOU, that's fine. Do what you want to yourself and your posessions to show that. However, it is NOT what defines your child. Your child is a completely different person than you, and might end up despising anime, sports, tv, videogames, etc. You can't tag a label on them like that, it's simply not fair. Names like Mary, Joey or Monica for caucasians if you are a hardcore christian, or friends fan are fine, because they don't necisarrily have that LABEL attatched to them. I know several monicas and joeys (don't know any marys though). However, names like USAGI, GOKU, NEHELENIA, etc DO.

Also, one last point. Picking these EXOTIC names that might get your child teased and emotionally damage them is also and extremely selfish thing to do. Right now it might not seem like it, but think about it. There are always 3 people to consider when naming a child. Yourself, your spouse, and your child. To say "I'm going to name my kid Sakura because I love anime" is an extremely selfish thing to say. You're not taking into account the feelings of your spouse nor your child. Now if your spouse agrees with you, that changes the story slightly, but there's still the consideration of your child that needs to be taken into account.

The bottom line is this, you CAN name your children whatever you want. As much as dumbass sailorjupiter might want to suggest, Tiff, myself, and all the others that agree with us are not going to hunt anyone down and PREVENT them from naming their kids what they want. It's your right. However, with some rights come great responsibilities (yes, cheesy line, i know), because they can potentially cause great damage. That's the whole point that's trying to be made.

TBA

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Post by Sailorasteroid » Fri Mar 18, 2005 2:12 pm

That makes a bit more sense, but two and a half more points:

1. If kids are being picked on by other kids because of their name, maybe it's not the name that's the problem, maybe it's the kids.

2. There's also a chance that the kid is going to want an exotic name and that by giving them a normal name, you're still going to have them disliking you.

2.5. Much like Umino, this is 90% hypothetical for me.
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Post by AnimeGuru0 » Fri Mar 18, 2005 2:28 pm

Sailorasteroid wrote:That makes a bit more sense, but two and a half more points:

1. If kids are being picked on by other kids because of their name, maybe it's not the name that's the problem, maybe it's the kids.
-_-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; You're not really around kids much......are you?

95% of things that kids are made fun of is not some type of changeable problem, it's something a child has no control over. Big foreheads. Hairy arms. Weird hairlines. Speech impediments. Names that they have no control over. You have to remember that children ARE NOT adults. They don't use logic or reason when doing..........anything. Children are not rational. That's why they're children. They do mean things cause they don't understand the consequences of their actions. To say that kids get picked on becuase of something they did to themselves is propsterous.
2. There's also a chance that the kid is going to want an exotic name and that by giving them a normal name, you're still going to have them disliking you.

2.5. Much like Umino, this is 90% hypothetical for me.
I have never EVER heard of a child resenting a parent due to a boring name that they got. Sure they may wish they had a more exotic name, but nothing near resentment. I HAVE heard of harsh resentment though from kids that had really weird names that didn't want them.

TBA

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Post by Em » Fri Mar 18, 2005 6:06 pm

ON this whole name I most likly won't call my kid's ( not that I'm going to have any) Most of the names I like right now as taste change. I was tlak over kid's name's wiht my firend Sam and she said she liked the name Lita butmost likely won't call a kid Lita as there'll be no key cahin or pen with her name on. For me it's the case of right now these are the name's I could choose but in year's to come I'd talk them though with the father about names we both liked.

As for wacked out names this "popular" cuople have called one kid Brooklyn ( as that's were she found out she was having the kid or something along thoese lines) and another Cruz ( means girl in Italian I think). Asl there's a Honey Boo going round London right now ^^;
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Post by Ayane » Fri Mar 18, 2005 8:14 pm

I guess it's all based on perspective. Yeah, kids will get teased about unique names. Hell, my initials were MJ, the J standing for Jackson. Guess who the kids teased me about during my '80's childhood? Guess what music artist I wound up hating as a result? Kids are going to find anything to tease about. Considering my husband's in the Air Force, we may actually BE in Japan when our first girl is born. Also, just because a name corresponds with a show/anime/game, that may just be where a person started liking the name. Example being that I would gladly name a girl Charlotte and call her Charli (or Charlie) as a nickname from Jungle2Jungle because that's where I first heard the nickname.

On the other side, the kid may actually have enough self-esteem to be proud of their name if it's out of the ordinary. Admittedly, the self-esteem would have to be built VERY early since they may be teased starting at a young age (IF they're teased at all...). Hell, I know someone who changed her name from Marianna to Sunny Bright when they became of age, and she still includes the last name Bright in spite of the fact she's married.

Then there's always the option of using the more unique name for the middle name, something the kid has the option of never bringing up. I dunno, prohibiting yourself from using names because they're of a different culture seems like a strange type of segregation from the rest of the world. But that's just my rambling.

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Post by RoastedTwinkies » Fri Mar 18, 2005 9:38 pm

Wow, this topic took an interesting turn. I agree with the majority of you that we should give our kids a name that matches our culture, generally. As much as I truly love the Japanese language, I would not give my kid a Japanese name. If I moved to Japan, and married a Japanese man there, obviously, then the circumstances may change. I would love to move to Japan and live there for five years or so, but I wouldn't want to live there permanently. So giving my child a Japanese name probably would not be fesible because I don't plan on living there permanently.

Not much discussion about naming kids after people. I know naming your kid after a celebrity does really sound silly. But Jordan Taylor is an accepted name in the North American culture. But I don't think my child would get teased for it, by his peers at least, because chances are that the future generation (when they're small) won't even know who Hanson is. Our generation would though, but I doubt any adults would make fun of him for it. Well, I can't say for sure that no adult would, because there's always exceptions. But most of them I think would not. I have been through a lot over the years and Hanson truly helped me through it all. Chances are that my kid will eventually ask where I got his name from, and that will give me the chance to tell him my story.
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Post by Tiff » Fri Mar 18, 2005 9:57 pm

Guru..you took the words completely out of my mouth. Thank you. THank you for explaining what I needed to get across.

Sailor Asteroid...I'm sorry, but you have a lot to learn before you even THINK of having kids. You know so littlea bout them, and how they act, it's laughable. You seem to see kids as little adults...and that's not how it is. At all. Guru has it pegged exactly right. I work around kids every damn day. He KNOWS what he's talkign about. You, on the other hand, do not.

I really don't think I have much more to say. I said what I needed to. Most people just didn't get it. Guru explained it perfectly. If what I'm trying to get across is STILL THAT hard to understand, then I can't help you. It can't be explained any simpler than it already has been.

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Post by Sailorasteroid » Fri Mar 18, 2005 10:19 pm

How ever much experience you have with kids you don't know them all. I was just as mature at 7 as I am now.

But as I said, I probably don't intend to have kids. Because I do understand the responsibility involved. And I don't want to raise them to do what I want them to do and use as a symbol for something.

But dammit, there should be someone I can treat that way.
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The Croonerism Spate (explanations upon request)
Be careful with this one, there is a bit of a pun involved. Dr. Spooner described his visit to a castle: "In the center of the fortress was the Palace Court. The gated entrance to this area was the court palace."

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Post by Tiff » Sat Mar 19, 2005 12:07 am

Sailorasteroid wrote:How ever much experience you have with kids you don't know them all. I was just as mature at 7 as I am now.

But as I said, I probably don't intend to have kids. Because I do understand the responsibility involved. And I don't want to raise them to do what I want them to do and use as a symbol for something.

But dammit, there should be someone I can treat that way.
...*shakes head, disgusted*

I'm quite through with this topic. I've got nothing more to say, except that I'm going to watch over this topic, and be sure it doesn't get out of hand again.

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Post by FireSoul » Sat Mar 19, 2005 1:36 pm

I don't think it's mature to call someone a dumbass because of their opinions. :roll: As for names, who cares. If it's not your kid then why bother.

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Post by Sailor Europa » Sat Mar 19, 2005 8:22 pm

Yes well.

I'm still iffy about wanting kids or not, however,

Girl names:

-Bonnie (name of my dead twin) Rose

-Alice (named after Alice Liddel (obsessed Alice in Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass fan)

Boy names:

-John (A tradition in my fiancés family is that their first born son is always called John. However, my fiancé was the first born son and his name is Mark. Of course, they named their second son John.)

-Joseph (My Dad's name is Joseph, my Grandpa's name was Joseph, and my Great Grandfather's name was..Guissepe?..er..Joseph.)


I'm not really in the rush for having kids. Of course, I'll have to think through their names, because I really don't want to regret giving my children names that I didn't want as much as others.
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Post by KoiNoVash » Sat Mar 19, 2005 8:49 pm

If I had a child right now, I suppose I would call them:

Girls:
-Lavender
-Jasmine

Boys:
-Skylar
-Michael

Like Sailor Europa, I'm definitly not wanting to have children right now (I'm in the middle of college!). I'll probably end up rethinking what I want to name my kids though, I've known so many people who hated their names.
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Post by Tiff » Sat Mar 19, 2005 9:01 pm

FireSoul wrote:I don't think it's mature to call someone a dumbass because of their opinions. :roll: As for names, who cares. If it's not your kid then why bother.
ADMIN MODE:

While yes, it was probably a bit wrong for Guru to have said that, he was NOT calling her a dumbass becuase of her opinions.

He called her a dumbass becuase of her behavior toward ME. He was calling her a dumbass becuase of her little comment about how my friends and the other mods are my "bodyguards." It had NOTHING to do with her opinions.

DROP the discussion between myself and Sailor Jupiter. It's over.

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Post by AnimeGuru0 » Sat Mar 19, 2005 11:15 pm

While yes, it was probably a bit wrong for Guru to have said that, he was NOT calling her a dumbass becuase of her opinions.
OFFTOPIC

What!? When did I call her that!? *scrolls up* *searches*

I didn't!

*tiff directs bob to response to sailor asteroid*

......................oh.

..............................

Oops. *smacks own wrist* Bad mod. I apologize, that was inappropriate.

/OFFTOPIC

TBA

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Post by Akarui Kibuno » Sun Mar 20, 2005 6:06 pm

So, to sum things up, we have this:

You can name your kid whatever you like.

However, you cannot:

- name the kid after something YOU like, because the child may end up hating it or being made fun of

- use a weird spelling that the child won't even be able to remember when learning to write at school

- use a weird spelling that no one will ever remember to pronounce right

- use a name that does not correspond to your culture, not because it's prohibited, but because things are done in certain times and places for a reason, that is, if the currency is different, if the language is different, if the roads are different, if the food is different, it's normal that the names are different as well

That, and as they all have said... ahem. The point of this discussion is not to govern people's lives. I pray to whoever hears me now that your last line was sarcasm, Sailorasteroid (and to answer your question, "someone" I don't think so, but if you can use a 3D program, I guess you could build up a virtual... thingy @[email protected]).

*next is not directed towards you in particular*

The point is that, technically, yes, you're the one who "made" the child. But the child has as much rights as you have. As Guru said, with rights come responsibility. Or "freedom of one stops where the other one's starts". It's almost like saying you can do anything to your kid from anything to anything (change the anything to any ewwwww or yuckkkkk thing you can think of) just because you're the parent of that child. Geeh. It's like cars. You have the right to buy a car but you can't just do whatever you like with it just cause you bought it (ahem, that's why the law exists). You have the right to have a computer and watch videos but you can't watch child porn. You have the right to have kitchen knives but you can't cut your spouse. I can't think of any others right now (don't want to get myself into nightmares just because of that) but I'm sure you all get the point.

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Post by AnimeGuru0 » Sun Mar 20, 2005 7:06 pm

Akarui - Well, to elaborate on what you said....

Yes, you can name your kids WHATEVER name you want. Nobody is denying you that right. If you want to name your kid Nahasapeetapetalan, no one will stop you. I really could care less.

The point my side of the argument is trying to make (my side? o_O;;;; ) is that, while you have every right to do so, it's not necisarrily a GOOD IDEA. For every action there is a consequence, and that's the point that's trying to be made.

So for example, sorry Asteroid, I'm going to use you as an example just cause you are arguing for the "other" side ( :P ), but if Asteroid for example wants to name his children........................Let's just say "Usagi, Mamoru, Ami, and Rei", that would be totally fine with me. If that's what he truly wanted to do I wouldn't stop him. I will never agree with his decision nor think it's a good idea, but they're his kids. I might even tell him that I don't think it's a good idea, that it's unwise to do so, but it's his right to name his kids, not mine.

Basically you can sum up my viewpoint in two sentences...

You can name your kids whatever you want.

However, that might not necisarrily be a wise decision.

And i love you too rui *huggle*

TBA

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Post by Sailorasteroid » Sun Mar 20, 2005 7:33 pm

Guru, as always, you are a model of sensibility. But I wouldn't name a kid Rei, as I'd be afraid she'd turn out to be a bitch. ^_^

And Akarui, not every right has responsibilities accompanying it. To draw forward your analogy, I can do whatever I want with my car, if I buy a track to do it on.

Furthermore, the matter of the name would go beyond their birth. Of course I'd expose them to Sailor Moon and other anime and try to instill in them the pride in whatever name I did give them.

And there's another matter to consider: you(plural) say that giving an odd name would result in them being unpopular. But do I really want them to become the popular type who listens to the Britney Spears-type music and dresses to be accepted? I want my children to be independent thinkers, preferably the nerdy anime-geek type I am, more than the other type. Will I brainwash them into it? Of course not. But I intend to raise them to my values, not those that are the safest. The name is just window dressing to that.
Last edited by Sailorasteroid on Sun Mar 20, 2005 8:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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The Croonerism Spate (explanations upon request)
Be careful with this one, there is a bit of a pun involved. Dr. Spooner described his visit to a castle: "In the center of the fortress was the Palace Court. The gated entrance to this area was the court palace."

Users whose sigs my quotes have made (now in two columns)
Tempest___________________Peachvampiress (I think)
Sylphiel (twice!)____________Neon Heart
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I <3 all you guys!

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Post by Em » Sun Mar 20, 2005 7:35 pm

Just make sure the registar can spell the name right or the kid could end up wiht a boys/girls name due to spelling errors. :D

Yes I type from the fact one of my name happnes to be the boy's spelling. XD
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